So yesterday was a busy day. Someone from my past, a guy, has a best friend who was dating my sister. Well, they finally found each other after so many years. We all used to hang out together and this guy and I would sometimes separate from my sister and her guy, so that we could go do things. Movies, dinner, what have you.
There were some issues as to why I never actually 'hooked up' with this guy and things juts kind of disappeared. Well to my knowledge. I was about 17 or 18 yrs old. I am now 41 years old and my memory of specific past times is not as good as my sister's. Anyway, so she and her past guy have been chatting it up. So one day, as I am at a birthday dinner for a family member, I eventually see this phone number in my phone. It was hours later after the person called and they called like 4 times and then texted me. It was the guy I was dating back then.
I was a little taken aback because due to the situation I am currently in, I didn't know that my sister would give him my phone number. But it took me a couple days to text him back. I told him I would get in touch with him when I could. No matter how crazy things are currently going, I am not ready to talk to anyone else.
So about a week has pasted. My current boyfriend and I have decided to take a break. Think on a lot of things through. This is somewhat of a relief for me as I need a break from him. We are not talking or seeing each other for a bit. I can relax a little. So last night, I get off work, go to get my little one, then have to come home and cook dinner. Dinner took a little longer than usual, but eventually it was done. On top of that, the little one was severely clingy and it was hard tearing the older kids away from their 'fun' to assist. So my emotions were running high. As I kneeled down in front of the table for a breather, the phone rings. It was the guy from the past. I didn't want to answer, but I had put him off long enough.
So we started conversing. I was a little irritated because I wasn't able to have peace as I talked. Baby half crying and whining, one son singing, the other talking. Whatever the case in the end, I did not like the conversation and do not believe I will talk to him again.
We have not seen nor talked to each other for over 20 yrs. It was if he tried to pick up where we left off back then. The problem is that so many years have past. I am not the same person I used to be. I have changed and grown. He definitely wanted to know why I would not 'give him some' back then. Really? After all this time and this is what you are seeking an answer for? He tells me he was crazy about me back then. he had me on a pedestal. I was supposed to marry him. I didn't know he liked me that much. I liked him but....IDK....
So wants to know why I didn't continue to give him a chance. I told him there was one specific thing that scared me about him. There was one time when we were in the car going somewhere. we stopped and this guy came up to the car, and he pulled this 'package' out from under his seat! I was shocked. I had always seen movies with this but never in real life. It scared the mess out of me. I didn't want to be associated with someone who's lifestyle was like that. He said in all that time he never did jail time. Was that supposed to be impressive? It wasn't. I was not the type of person who wanted to deal with people who did that. No matter how much money it brought him. Not worth it to me.
So I told him there were other things as well but I didn't feel at liberty to say. All he kept talking about was how he felt about me. Then he was trying to see if he would actually 'get it' now because he felt I owed it to him. I was speechless. I don't owe him a dang on thing. Especially my 'womanhood'
What further ticked me off was the fact that he was cursing like every other word! Wow.
You don't know me know. You have no idea how I am, what I do, or what my beliefs are now. So why approach me like time never stopped? I just didn't like it at all. You want my 'womahood' and we'll see where it goes from there? Who do you think I am? (you didn't get it back then so why think you should get it now?) Who do you think you are? Are you kidding me? I got off the phone and me and my baby went to bed. I didn't have a restful night's sleep.
Until next time..........SMH
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